this is what it feels like to be insane
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good evening does anyone remember that one disney channel movie where a family wins an entire house that’s artificially intelligent like Siri but as the movie progresses the house becomes more and more strict and obsessive and eventually it holds the family hostage
nope how was your day today?
very good! it was raining and there was a nice slug on the pavement
wow!! right on the pavement?
right on the pavement!
It was called Smart House
rich ppl are like so easily convinced abt ghosts I remember growing up it was near this vacant lot and whenever I broke a toy instead of going to face the wrath of my mother I would fucking bury it in that lot and then sure enough, some dude tried to develop the land and found a ton of buried rotten dolls and shit and told everyone it was haunted
it’s been over a decade and that lot is still vacant
You single handedly tanked the value of someone’s prime real estate and that makes me happy
As soon as I read this I immediately started thinking of ways to do this on purpose to get cheap land and I was five posts down my dash before I realised I was becoming Scooby Doo villain
when dogs are scary smart
over the last several months, we have been implementing a protocol to eliminate karybelle the sheltie’s barking surrounding her mealtimes. we have accomplished this by initially introducing an alternate activity during prep time (stuffed kong) and religiously giving her a time out gated in the yard if she stops that activity to bark, thus delaying her dinner until she’s quiet. this has been extremely successful; she’s gone from barking literally 100+ times during meal prep to barking 0 times, and only occasionally slips up. the behavior she has chosen to replace her meal-prep-screaming (after all, that energy has to go somewhere) is frantically - but silently - running circles around the coffee table to finally slam into a perfect down-stay as her bowl is set down.
this evening as the food was coming out, karybelle seamlessly slipped into her silent circling routine. except after a couple of reps, she abruptly changed course, yeeted herself out the dog door, barked once, and immediately jumped back in to resume her circling.
if that isn’t a demonstration of crystal clear understanding of criteria, i...don’t know what is lmao
literally the canine version of this
me, reading this post, having no idea what the fuck a stuffed kong is:
ASFHFHSJALKSJSHDHJS
